Philadelphia Phillies designated hitter Kyle Schwarber and first baseman Bryce Harper celebrate after Schwarber's home run against the Detroit Tigers at Citizens Bank Park on August 3, 2025. (Grace Del Pizzo/On Pattison)
PHOENIX — Baseball is a uniquely ritualistic sport.
For at least seven months a year, a group of people spends the majority of every single day together. They walk into work together, they take long plane rides together, they don't really get a break from each other.
Being with the same people for that long can get exhausting, so they have to break up the monotony somehow. Therefore, over time, inside jokes are converted into intricate rituals.
"It's been a thing in baseball where usually everyone has some sort of a handshake," Kyle Schwarber said.
The Phillies are no exception. Before, during and after games, players can be seen speeding through precisely memorized handshakes.
But every routine has to start somewhere. So how do two players come up with a handshake?
"Honestly? That's a really good question," Aaron Nola said. "I don't really know how they come up. Sometimes they just come up."
Being the longest-tenured Phillie, Nola said he's had some handshakes in place for seven or eight years. He prefers simplicity, opting for an open-hand dap over a long, involved sequence.
"Some of them are a little too long and too much for me," Nola said. "I like them to keep it short."
Nola then directed On Pattison to speak with Brandon Marsh and Garrett Stubbs, "the handshake kings," to collect more insight.
"I think Kepler and I have a handshake of, like, eight additions that's going on this season," Marsh said. "It started off as a one-two, and now it's like a 20-second thing."
Let's set the scene for a second: a grown man approaches another grown man in a Major League Baseball clubhouse to ask him if he wants to create a secret handshake, just for the two of them.
It definitely comes across a little silly. Putting yourself out there to ask the question seems strangely personal, almost vulnerable. It gives shades of third-grade girls teaching each other how to play 'Miss Mary Mack' during recess.
But according to Marsh, initiating the creation of a handshake really is that simple.
"I think you gotta be assertive a little bit and say, 'hey, man, we need a handshake. What are we doing? I have one with everyone but you,'" Marsh said.
Apparently, that's what Marsh and Harrison Bader have been saying to each other for weeks.
"We are dropping the ball on that," Marsh admitted. "We really, really need one before this October stretch. We can't just be dapping up and hugging. We've got to have something cool like everyone else."
Even though Bader has yet to develop a handshake with Marsh – which is somewhat shocking, honestly – he has developed a pretty meaningful one with Nick Castellanos:
Harrison Bader and Nick Castellanos have a pretty electric handshake😂 pic.twitter.com/NhwpT1RpiG
"Nick's my favorite (handshake), yeah," Bader said. "Because we end it with ring-chasing, because we kind of flex our ring fingers at each other. That's obviously the end goal here, so it's nice to do that all the time."
The ring-chasing combined with the phone signal, which Bader confirmed is a reference to his walk-up song, makes for a pretty cool sequence.
One handshake that gets a fair amount of attention (because fans see it after every time Schwarber rounds the bases, which happens a lot) is Schwarber's handshake with Bryce Harper, pictured in the top photo of this story.
Schwarber described his handshakes as "not creative" and "very plain." That shared cheek touch doesn't exactly fit inside those parameters, but boy, does it have a story behind it.
"(Harper) slapped me one day, so I slapped him back, and then, yeah, it's stayed in there."
Obviously, they've toned it down a bit – "it's nicer now, it's a little pat" – but imagine if after one of Schwarber's home runs, he and Harper greeted each other by whacking each other in the face.
That would make for great television.
Harper also shares a double cheek kiss with Garrett Stubbs during their handshake, and the explanation from Stubbs was much simpler.
"We just love each other. We just want to show each other affection," Stubbs said. "That's all it is."
Part of what makes a handshake special is the meaning behind it. Marsh cited his handshake with Castellanos as his favorite.
"It's just a quick little hand touch, and then we cover each other's faces with our fists. That's what his newborn baby son Kobi does," Marsh said, raising his fists to his face to demonstrate.
"He always sits there like this the whole time, so that's what Nick and I do."
Schwarber wouldn't name a favorite handshake, although he did express his preferences.
"I mean, there's some that involve hitting, and then I get hit, and I don't enjoy it as much. But it's all different, unique, so they're all fun," Schwarber said.
So what's the hallmark of a good, satisfying handshake?
Answers ranged from physical qualities, to the meaning behind it, to Aaron Nola declaring himself the worst guy to ask.
"Good movement, good pace, quick, multiple body parts involved," Bader said.
Marsh named speed and precision, pointing out how fast NBA players' pregame handshakes are.
Stubbs said inside jokes are the key, and Schwarber agreed.
"You just try to do funny things, silly things to just make people enjoy it, right? Like, that's what we do. It's all about enjoying it, smiling before we're about to go out there and compete." Schwarber said.
"I'm shocked I remember them all. I've got a terrible memory."
